Today a major problem is gender relations. Woman assert themselves, and often the man is a victim of the gender war. It used to be when I was young about fifty plus years ago, that I never heard of somebody getting divorced until high school, when a judge did something scandalous and his wife divorced him. But divorces because two people didn’t get along I don’t recall. However, in recent times, women have organized, they have gotten a lot of backing and a lot of money, and they announce to the world, “Orthodox Feminism” or just plain Feminism or just plain whatever they say to declare their strength and gender relations. Men are embarrassed to fight with women, and most of them don’t or if they do they may regret it, especially when the secular courts and society back ladies. So let us take a look at gender issues from a Torah perspective. Is there another way?
The gemora in Berochose 17A states,
“Greater is the trust that G‑d has promised to women more than [what He
promised] to men, as it says, ‘women of trust, hearken to My voice’.” There is
a gemora in Menochose 29b that there are few Tsadikim [great in righteousness]
in heaven, which probably means men, because the ladies are assured of paradise
as we noted before.
I recall many years ago in
Baltimore that somebody noted, “Non-Orthodox Jews are split in their Jewish
activities. Men choose non-Jewish organizations and women choose Jewish
organizations.” I don’t claim to have the facts and figures, but if I had to
guess, I would choose the women as faithful Jewesses over the general picture
of men. I did see some statistics recently about the huge amount of
intermarriage going on, and an Israeli politician said that if this continues
only the Orthodox will remain in Israel. So the issue is not so much men and
women in the modern secular world, because with all of the intermarriage, the
only ones who will remain will be the Orthodox. But as I go back fifty or sixty
years, there was a different climate. The secular Jew was not secular in the
sense of intermarrying. In fact, the Yeshivas were supported mostly by secular
Jews who had a Jewish heart. I remember when a wealthy Jew, Mr. Himmelfarb in
Washington, sent a $5,000 check to my Yeshiva, Yeshiva Chofetz Chaim of
Baltimore. The Yeshiva contacted him and asked for a personal meeting that was
successful. Again, the non-Orthodox Jews with Jewish hearts were the only ones
around in my childhood who could give big money, and they kept the Yeshivas
from complete collapse, because who else had big money? Now there are many
wealthy Orthodox Jews, and I don’t know how many Jews of heart are out there in
the secular world.
Our teaching in the gemora is that
Jewish women are connected to G‑d more than men, and they have G-d’s promise
and trust more than men. In pure gender statistics, mark one for the ladies.
When I married, I had more energy
than I have today, and I used to give long talks on Shabbos to my family. I
spoke about the Jewish attitude towards women. One of my favorite proofs was the Matriarchs
versus the Patriarchs. Abraham wanted to keep Ishmael his son in the family,
but Sora wanted him out. G‑d told Abraham, “Everything that Sora tells you hearken to her voice.” That means, says
Rashi, everything, because she was greater than her husband Abraham in
prophecy. What would have happened to the Jewish people if Ishmael had remained
in the family and would have been the senior son because Isaac was born much
later. Well, we know that Ishmael was a fighter and had quarrels with everyone,
and what kind of Jewish nation would that be?
Next generation of male and female was Isaac
and Rebecca. Isaac wanted to bless Esau and Rebecca got the blessings for
Jacob. Can we imagine what kind of family Jews would be if Esau had been the
senior of the Jewish people? The Torah and Rashi tell us that his wives were
pagans who insulted Rebecca, and Esau himself was a horror how he acted. How
did the Jewish people survive? Only from the women.
Next generation was another struggle who would
be the boss of the Jewish people, when Jacob preferred Rachel but somehow ended
up with Leah. Leah eventually had more children than any other wife of Jacob,
and her children were the great Jewish families. From Leah came Judah and the
Jewish monarchy, Levi and the priesthood and the service in the Temple, also the
great scholars of the Jewish people and those who supported these great scholars.
If Jacob had succeeded he would have had Rachel as the main wife, but she had
only one son and her second son was born as she died. Furthermore, Rachel was
responsible for Jacob marrying Leah, because Rachel knew that if she married
Jacob and not Leah, that Leah would be humiliated. Thus, the ladies saved the
Jewish people, once again.
History is on the side of the
ladies. G‑d’s trust and promise is with the ladies. And let us continue with
Jewish history, when we find that the father of Moshe divorced his wife when Pharaoh
decreed on the death of Jewish male babies. Miriam convinced her father to
remarry his wife, and Moses was born. Who saved Moses from drowning in the
river? Miriam and her mother. When the Jews left Egypt, the females led by Miriam
brought musical instruments because they were sure that G‑d would save and
protect the Jews. When the Egyptians were drowned in the sea as they attempted
to attack the Jewish camp and bring them back to Egypt, Miriam and the ladies
danced and sang and played musical instruments. The men just stood there and
recited a few lines of praise. The men did not bring musical instruments from
Egypt, they brought weapons, which were at that point useless. Mark another one
for the ladies.
When Moses went to heaven to receive the Torah
from G‑d, the remaining Jews built the Golden Calf and some worshipped it.
Aharon the brother of Moses was blamed for making the Golden Calf. But the
women did not worship it. Let’s give another check to the ladies for their
trust in G‑d, and the men, well, anyway.
Just one more point here. The Jews
had many leaders throughout the generations. Only one was perfect, Devorah, who
led the Jews in judgment and war. No men were perfect. Let us now turn to the
Creation story, the sins of Adam and Eve, and the power of penitence.
Moon Women
in the Creation Story Before Women Were Created
When the Book of Elijah begins with
the discussion of Adam being driven like a woman from the Garden of Eden, it
was not trying to pour on the pain and the shame of the sinners who used to
live in the Garden of Eden. Let us state briefly here that the idea of being a
woman is a central theme of the Creation story, as Rashi states and as is
indicated by the various female and male terms used for heaven at that time.
Briefly here, the beginning of the Creation story is a story about the
superiority of women. The strangest teaching I ever saw in the Talmud is about
the argument between G‑d and the Moon. It seems that the Sun and Moon in the
earliest phase of Creation were of equal luminosity. The Moon, a female, wanted
to lower the power of the Sun, who was a male, and make herself the sole strong
light. She argued but G‑d did not agree, and so the Moon was frustrated,
especially when G‑d instructed her “Go and reduce yourself” which was the
opposite of what she wanted.[1]
What is really amazing is that
after the long debate between the female Moon and G‑d, G-d said: Bring a sacrifice for Me because I
made the Moon small. We see from this that G‑d accorded the demands of the Moon
with great respect, despite His decision to deny them. Of course, the Sun and
Moon who are depicted as male and female were not humans at all, but rather
angels whose job it was to keep the world functioning for humans who would
receive the Torah. When we accord the Moon the status of an angel, we are
amazed at the pure chutzpah to argue with G‑d to such a degree that she did not
give in an inch. We cannot understand why G‑d declared that for denying her
demands to shrink the Sun and to leave her the sole major light, He must bring
a sacrifice! Now, to a simple person like me, it sounds like the Moon was
spouting pure chutzpah and deserved a good something, but G‑d obviously did not
see things that way. He had the greatest respect for her demands, and we surely
want to know why. We also want to better understand how an angel who is in
charge of the Moon should be a woman and the sun a male.
Let us turn to the Kabbalistic
classic Ore Yokor from Rav Moshe Kordevero zt”l, who was eulogized by the Ari
z”l that he never sinned and did not die for his failures, but for the general
situation where people live and die, and some die without any sin. On page 185
(Shaar 6. Simon 32 beginning - I will make for him a helpmate opposite him) we
learn that male or Adam is Kindness, and female is Gevurose, or strength,
power, and conquest. Now this does not sound like a regular male or female, but
this was the status of Creation.
Let us take a look at Rashi in the
first passage in the Torah, the Creation story. Rashi notes that the first
passage in the Torah is “In the beginning ELOKIM created the heavens and the
earth.” Later on, Rashi notes, in the beginning of chapter two, the Torah
changes the Name of G-d from Elokim to HaShem Elokim. Rashi explains that Elokim
means strict justice and punishment. This was the Name of the first chapter of
the Torah, the Creation of the entire world in seven days. It was done with the
female level of justice and strength. Bu G‑d saw that such a world filled with
justice and strength would wipe out the wicked, and what would happen to the
world? Therefore, in chapter two of the Torah, we see a change from ELOKIM to
HASHEM ELOKIM, HASHEM means “the Name” which is a hint to the ineffable Name
that is not pronounced. It is a level of mercy, not rigid justice. Rashi
explains that if the world existed with ELOKIM or justice it could not exist
because of the sins of mortals. Therefore, after the Creation of seven days and
the world and its people and animals, the system of Creation was changed from
rigid justice ELOKIM to a compromise with mercy HaShem.
The MOON was female and the pure
female essence is rigid justice, wipe out the wicked, etc. The MOON noticed
that the world had two equally powerful suns, the MOON, her, and the male SUN.
She noticed that the world was created in the first chapter of Creation with
the female level of ELOKIM and she demanded that G‑d accept this by denigrating
the male mercy level of the SUN. She was right, but her level would lead to
destruction of the world. Therefore, G‑d recognized that she was right as
proven by the word ELOKIM used throughout the first chapter of the Torah and
the Creation story. And yet, G‑d did not accept a world that would be
destroyed. And what He did was as follows: There would be two systems for the
Creation. One level and system for ordinary people, and one for the righteous.
The righteous would live with the
female level of justice and be punished in this world for their sins. Ordinary
people would live in a world where justice is joined with mercy, otherwise
ordinary people would not last. If so, the MOON was for the righteous people,
and the SUN for the ordinary people. G‑d acknowledged this by stating “bring a
sacrifice for Me because I refused the request of the Moon.” G‑d realized that
His refusal to recognize the first phase of the Creation to destroy wickedness
and sustain rigid righteousness was a valid problem for the Moon who was
created for rigid righteousness, the level of the first chapter of the Torah
and Creation. However, the world required two levels to avoid general
destruction for people who were not exceedingly pious.
In the end, the Moon female was
diminished and along with her the female who struggles with the power of men.
But women are closer to G‑d and piety than men, and are closer to Heaven than
men. But their struggles in this world, with the clash between the first and
second chapters of the Torah, indicate a problem for women in this world,
although it guarantees them a higher place than men with G‑d, which is the
ultimate purpose of Creation. The gender realities are different between men
and women and who is to understand them? Even the angel of Genesis call the
Moon was befuddled by it, so what can we expect to understand? We have to
understand that we don’t understand, but
G‑d does understand.
Before we leave this topic and find
a lot of confused people in our wake, let me turn to a related topic, but one
that is not obviously related to it, but one that is very strongly related to
our subject.
In our daily prayers, in the
beginning after introductory prayers, we come to the beginning of the main
prayers that begin with Baruch Sheomar.
The prayer Baruch Sheomar begins the part of prayer where we are not allowed to
speak anything but prayer. Thus it is an elevation over the earlier
introductory prayers. After we conclude Baruch Sheomar with a blessing and G‑d’s
Name, we come to a passage in of prayer of praise for G‑d, beginning “A song of
thanks.” Ostensibly, it appears exactly like all of the Psalms of David and
others who wrote praises of G‑d. And yet, incredibly, the Code of Laws on Orach
Chaim 51:9 tells us that we must sing this prayer differently than other
prayers and Songs of praise because “all of the Songs will be cancelled other
than Mizmor LiSoda”. And yet, when we look at the Song of Mizmor LiSoda we see
nothing different than the Book of Psalms and other songs to G‑d. So why will
all Songs be cancelled except this Song?
I showed this question to various
people and got no response. But I have an answer and several people accepted
it. We live in the world of finite knowledge. We don’t know G‑d very well, of
course, and we understand very little of His plans for us and His processes to
deal with us. But all of us suffer problems of some degree, and when something
imperfect happens in our lives we say, “I am sure that G‑d meant this to happen
for the best.” That is, we have faith in G‑d that He is a G‑d of kindness and
our pain is for our own good. But we don’t know this at all, we just have a faith
in G‑d’s kindness. A time will come, however, when G‑d will reveal His absolute
kindness that will find us in an elevated state whereby we can absorb with our
minds the truth of G‑d’s kindness. Then we will see clearly, not on faith, that
all of our suffering was for our own good, something that is completely remote
from us today and until the higher light is revealed to us in the Future.
The Song Mizmor LiSoda is a Song of
Happiness, a happiness that does not proceed from faith, which is a dark thing
beyond our finite minds. A Song of Happiness means a true happiness that
reveals the heavenly processes of G‑d’s treatment of mortals, their suffering
and their problems. In the future, and only then, will mortals realize that our
pain in this world was really for our good, not through blind faith, but in the
blazing light of heavenly truth which will only be revealed in the Future, when
people are worthy to see this Advanced Light and know exactly what G‑d had in
mind to help us and make us happy when we suffered.
Since only Mizmor LiSoda has this capacity, it
will stand uniquely in the Future, when all of us will know that our suffering
was not accepted on blind faith, but on clear and revealed truth, in the Light
of the Future not available now. At that point, our blind faith will be
supplanted by revealed Heavenly light of the Future World, and new love of G‑d
will supplant the old blind faith.
The Book of Solomon A Song of Songs
is about suffering of a woman. Nothing in that book explains anything but simply
tells of a woman’s suffering. In the Future World, especially at the time of
Mizmor Lisoda being revealed in truth Future World light, that book will
explain a lot that is hidden now. But those who merit it will be especially
those women whose faith sustained them. These women are those mentioned in the
gemora “Greater is the promise of faith that G‑d has for the women than He has
for the men.”[2] Only
then will the Moon shine with her faith vindicated, along with other women. And
G‑d’s pledge to atone for what He did to the woman will be understood in a
different and higher light.
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