In recent posts on our blog www.torahhalacha.blogspot.com
we showed clearly that Rabbi Breitowitz and Rabbi Heineman and Rabbi Kaminetsky
are actively encouraging people to marry with invalid Gittin or no GET. In each
of these posts we protested this and showed the Torah sources that such
activity produces mamzerim and invalid Gittin. Here we want to deal with the
source of the problem, rabbis who have no serious training from senior rabbis
how to pasken shaalose and just let go with their imaginations and inventions.
This today is very common. I once had a fight with a large group of rabbis
about just such a problem, and I am convinced that none of the rabbis I spoke
to know the laws of Gittin, despite the fact that they encourage coercions of
the husband and feel that whatever crosses their mind is “daas Torah.”
I spoke with a senior dayan who was sure that pressuring the
husband was the right thing to do. I showed him the Shulchan Aruch in Even
Hoezer 77 paragraphs 2 and 3, where the Shulchan Aruch, the Ramo, the Chelkas
Mechokake, the Bais Shmuel and the Gro all say that coercions based upon the
demand of the wife to be rid of her husband is forbidden. The Gro says that
nobody [in Shulchan Aruch generations] disagrees. The senior dayan had no
response, and muttered, “I am not familiar with that.” Yes, some rabbis
disagree with the Shulchan Aruch. “They are not familiar” with it. What is there source? I ask and have been
asking this for years with no response.
There is, I feel, a basic misunderstanding about the extreme
sensitivity of tampering with the bonds of marriage. Here are some sources from
the major authorities. The first is from the Gaon Reb Yosef ben Leb whose
Teshuvose are quoted extensively by the Beis Yosef. (See Shem HaGedolim on Reb
Yosef ben Leb, and see also Shem HaGedolim on Reb Yosef Karo, that quotes Koray
HaDoros that Reb Yosef ben Lev was the rebbe of the Beis Yosef, but the Shem
HaGedolim disputes this.) Nonetheless, Reb Yosef ben Leb was a major posek in the time of the Beis Yosef and
is quoted by him extensively. Now let us turn to Reb Yosef ben Leb and his
comments on the severity of severing the marital bonds of a Jewish woman.
In his teshuvo sefer Teshuvose Mahari ben Leb, Shaalose
IV:19:3 We find, “When dealing with the sin of a married woman remarrying [such
as whether a GET is kosher or whether her husband is dead] we are stringent and
do not permit her to remarry even if most rabbis permit it.” We see that so
serious is the sin of a married woman remarrying that even if most rabbis
permit something, and although we usually follow the majority, we are stringent
and refuse the woman the right to remarry.
Now, I do not say that this is true in every single case
dealing with a married woman and her GET or her husband’s disappearance. I am
simply pointing out how terrible a thing it is for a married woman to remarry
without a clear permission from the authorities. Although the Torah recognizes
the capacity of the ROV or larger group against the smaller group, if the
smaller group may be right, we fear to allow a woman to remarry.
Let us talk about the hideous sin of the Kaminetskys in
Philadelphia. A married woman, with no GET at all, has permission from Rabbi Shalom Kaminetsky
to remarry without a GET. Surely he asked his father Reb Shmuel and got his
permission. And perhaps some rabbi here or there permitted this, as there are
some rabbis who say things that nobody heard of, because they want to help
ladies. What would the Gaon Reb Yosef ben Leb say about this? He just said that
the style of the great rabbis of Israel is to deny the woman the right to
remarry even if the majority of the rabbis consider her GET kosher or her
husband to be dead. We so fear the sin of a married woman remarrying without a
Kosher GET or without a dead husband, that we violate the major rule to follow
the majority. But here the Kaminetskys defy the opinion of all of the rabbis in
the world who have expressed their shock at the permission of a married woman
to remarry, and have stated that the child born after her remarriage will be a
mamzer. Here, we find the majority forbidding her to remarry, and some rabbi
who nobody knows his name has permitted it and the Kaminetskys are permitting
the woman to remarry because of this one idiot or maybe two idiots. This is
incredible.
But let us look into this a bit more. Can we violate a
majority opinion just because it is a marriage question?
Let us turn to the Shulchan Aruch Even Hoezer 17:102: The Shulchan Aruch there deals with the
question of a man who fell into the ocean or some body of water whereby people
could not see its boundaries from where they were standing. They tried to find
him and spent time waiting for some word from him, or the sight of his body,
but failed. Can the wife remarry? The Shulchan Aruch says that she may not
remarry, and if she remarried, she must get a divorce from her second husband.
Obviously, we fear the minority when it comes to a married woman.
Most people who sink into the ocean and are not seen
afterwards are dead. But some, as the Talmud quotes, manage somehow to reach
dry land. If so, the majority would say that such people are dead. But a minority,
only a small minority, survive. Therefore, the woman, who is a real Agunah, may
not remarry because of the small possibility that her husband somehow reached
dry land. And if she does remarry, she must get a divorce from the second
husband.
See also Tosfose Kesubusoe 2a d”h שאם היה
לו. At the end of the Tosfose he says that if a
husband has a doubt if he is allowed to be with his wife, and according to the
general rules in that case we could find a leniency and permit him to be with
her, there is an exception. That is, if the sin the husband would do with his wife
is only a one time sin, such as the sin of eating something not kosher, in such
a case we could be lenient. But if the question is not about a one time sin,
but a sin that would be forever, such as whether the wife is permitted at all
to him, even if it is not a serious sin such as being with another person’s
wife, the rabbis forbade it lest it lead to a permanent sin. According to this,
even if the general rules would permit a woman to remarry based on this or
that, but if the sin is possible and it would be forever, in such a case it is
quite possible that the rabbis forbade the lenience.
If so, surely in a case where the question is remarrying a
married woman, we must be stringent. Even if most rabbis permit the marriage,
but a few do not, we do not permit the marriage. Thus, what Reb Yosef ben Leib
says is the custom of the great rabbis not to permit a woman to remarry if even
a minority of rabbis forbid it, has a
source in the above Tosfose.We can add to this the opinion of Rabbeinu Tam in his famous
teshuva forbidding coerced Gittin. He says, at the conclusion of his remarks,
that “It is preferable for a woman to die an Agunah rather than to marry and
bring laz or gossip upon her children.” Note that he does not say that a woman
should die rather than remarry without a GET. That is surely forbidden. But he
says that a woman who has a right to remarry, perhaps a rabbi permits her, but
she knows that people will talk about it, and consider her a sinner and her
children maybe a mamzer, she should rather die an Agunah than to remarry. But
today rabbis exist who feel that even remarriage without a GET is permissible
so that a woman not remain unmarried. A rabbi who defies the Shulchan Aruch and
Rabbeinu Tam is a great sinner.
Surely these rabbis want to help ladies to remarry. But what
about the children? When the vast majority of rabbis consider the remarriage
forbidden, are the children born from it not mamzerim? And if some rabbis
permit it and some rabbis forbid it, is the child born from this not a doubtful
mamzer? And a doubtful mamzer may not marry a mamzeress, and may not marry a
regular Jewish girl. What, therefore, is
accomplished by these idealistic rabbis lacking in the basic tools of
paskening?
Paskening a shaalo requires shimush. And this is especially
true when paskening about marriage laws. I talked frequently to Gedolim Reb
Aharon Kotler and Reb Moshe Feinstein. When I went to Posek Hador Reb Yosef
Shalom Elyashev and asked for his name for my Gittin Beth Din, he immediately
granted it. One of the things he told me then was that any Beth Din that flouts
the Shulchan Aruch is not recognized as a Beth Din. Recently, gedolim in Israel
have ruled that a Beth Din that violates the Shulchan Aruch to coerce a GET
makes invalid Gittin, and the woman who receives a GET from such a Beth Din
must get another GET. The first one is not recognized.
In the next few years, many children will be born from
mothers “helped” by certain rabbis. And woe to those children.
Despite all of this, one who has a child born from such
strange Gittin should check about the child from somebody familiar with the
laws of Gittin and mamzeruth.
Children born from “funny” Gittin will not laugh. They will
cry. The above rabbis will split the
Jewish world. Beware of marrying anyone who was divorced by them. That is how
bad it is.
