The Horror of Tamir Epstein Freidman Making Mamzerim

By Rabbi Dovid E. Eidensohn

Tamir Epstein Friedman of Philadelphia has left her husband without a GET. Rabbi Notto Greenblatt of Memphis, Tennessee, re-married her although he knew that she did not have  a GET from her husband. Tamir’s real  husband Aharon wanted to arrange a GET, but the Rabbis Kaminetsky claimed that they have proof that Aharon, the husband, has serious mental illnesses that cannot be cured and she is therefore justified in leaving him and remarrying without a GET.

We will bring sources here to show that even if this claim that Aharon Friedman had mental problems that can’t be cured and no woman could live with it was true, and it surely is not at all true, she would still not be free. These are the words of the Gadol HaDor in America before Reb Moshe and during some of Reb Moshe’s life, the Gaon RavYosef Eliyohu Henkin, in his work The Writings of The Gaon Rav Yosef Eliyohu Henkin (Volume I in the section Pirushei Ivro page כג  45): “We have not heard and have not known from Talmudic times that a Kiddushin can be negated because of a blemish, and certainly after a full Marriage [when the couple was together] or [have we heard] that it was ruled that she is free without a GET. And we have seen these kind of questions in all places and at all times, and in all of these instances they required a GET! We see from this that no matter what the circumstances of the blemish and problem, it was at best still a doubt and it was impossible to negate the Kiddushin at all. Even if the blemish was proven and even if the other side did not know about it previously. And look at the Teshuva of the Noda Biyehuda II number 80…”

The Noda Biyehuda there discusses many cases of women who were trapped in terrible marriages and were Agunose mamosh, and some wanted to claim that “for such a husband she did not accept marriage”.  But the Noda Biyehuda rejects this and shows that even many women who were unable to tolerate their husbands and were Agunose and were tricked into marriage could not negate the marriage. The Gaon Rav Henkin in his two volume collection of writings devotes much time to explaining these laws and basically says that when a couple marries even if great problems and blemishes are found the marriage cannot be negated without a GET, similar to what the Noda Biyehuda says. If there are physical problems that render a woman AILENUSE or incapable of serving as a woman in marriage, or if a man had a similar problem, there may be a possibility to negate the marriage. But if someone is a normally structured male or female, and has serious problems, what Rav Henkin says is true. He also treats in his work at length about Ailenuse. See also Tosfose Kesubose 72b d”h על מנת. Rav Henkin devotes much to these kind of questions in Volume I page 39 – 50.                                                                                                                                                                HaGaon Reb Moshe Feinstein zt'L  disagrees and with certain extreme cases will consider the woman unmarried because had she known about the husband she never would have married him. But I heard from Reb Moshe’s gabei and the Gaon Rav Avigder Miller zt”l that Reb Moshe refrained later on in his life from doing some of the more extreme findings in his teshuvose about Gittin.  If so, we can probably doubt if Reb Moshe would want the teshuvose about remarrying without a GET to be done today. This is because even Reb Moshe accepts that nobody who dealt with these issues ever agreed with him, going back generations. The greatest authorities such as Kovneh Rov and Bais HaLevi the Rov of Brisk and father of Reb Chaim Soloveitchik clearly forbid negating a marriage regardless of blemish or such problems. And their refusal to accept this is a statement of the gemora Kesubose 73b based on a Mishneh Kesubose 72b and a gemora that is quoted in the Shulchan Aruch EH 39:5 with no disagreement.  From the Gro and Beis Shmuel there it would seem that the obligation for a GET is a Torah obligation not just rabbinical obligation. See also Even Hoezer 117 3-4.

  And even if Reb Moshe did want marital negation done today, he makes it clear that he only permits this if there is absolutely no chance for a GET.  Everything, everything, must be done to get a GET otherwise he does not give permission for the woman to remarry without a GET. Aharon Friedman told me he would give a GET but wanted better visitation rights. Reb Moshe would thus never permit Aharon’s wife to remarry. Thus the two Gedolei haDor of the past generation, Rav Henkin and Reb Moshe, would both forbid Tamir from remarrying without a GET. The Noda Biyehuda, one of the greatest poskim of the past centuries, makes it clear that in the case of much worse problems than what Tamir faced, he forbids her to remarry without a GET. And we mentioned before that the Kovneh Rov, Gadol HaDor and the Bais HaLevi Rov of Brisk and father of Reb Chaim Soloveitchik, also required a GET. So Rabbi Greenblatt and the Kaminetsky crew disagree with Reb Moshe, Rav Henkin, the Noda Biyehuda, the Kovneh Rov, the Bais HaLevi and the fact that Reb Moshe himself says that throughout the generations, when these questions come up, the rabbis always refused permission for the woman to remarry. But Rabbi Greenblatt disagrees with centuries of clear pesak based upon a teaching in Shulchan Aruch which is based upon an open gemora in Kesubose 73b and a Mishneh 72b.

Those who dealt with Aharon and Tamir in their marriage problems say that the whole Heter of Rabbi Greenblatt is completely wrong, and that any child Tamir will have with her new husband are mamzerim. The sin of this falls on Rabbi Greenblatt, and those who tricked him with clever deceptions will answer in this world and the next.

1.       See EH 39:5 – If one marries a woman with Kiddushin alone, and does not make a condition but finds that she has a blemish most people refuse to accept, it is a doubt if the Kiddushin is negated and so the woman must have a GET.

2.       If one marries a woman with Nisuin and makes no conditions, but finds that she has a blemish most people refuse to accept, it seems that she is married and needs a GET  but does not get any Kesubo money. EH 117:3-4

3.       See Kesubose 172b the Mishneh and the gemora on 173b about if a marriage is negated because somebody had a problem.  One opinion is that we need a GET dirabonon and one holds it is a doubt and we need a GET from the Torah. The Beis Shmuel and Gro rule in Shulchan Aruch 39:5 that the GET is a Torah obligation (see Tosphose על מנת 72b, which is the opinion of Rovo in the gemora).

4.       In the event that the blemish or problem was that the male or female were physically unlike normal men or women, this may produce a situation when if this is discovered after the marriage that the marriage is negated. See Rav Henkin’s sefer Volume I page 41 about a woman who had a structural problem and men who lacked the ability to procreate, etc. See 41-50 there.

5.       A prominent Dayan went to Israel and talked to Rav Nissim Karelitz, who told him that Tamir needed a GET to remarry. The Head of a Beth Din said that without a GET her children will be mamzerim.

6.       What is the halacha when rabbis disagree about a woman being able to remarry? The rebbe of the Beis Yosef, Reb Yosef ben Leiv the מהר"י בן לב states that if rabbis disagree the woman should not remarry. And even if the majority of rabbis permit the remarriage but some forbid it, the custom of the rabbis in his time was for the woman not to remarry.

7.       This has a source in Tosfose Kesubose 2a that when somebody deals with a possible sin that will last for a long time, such as a marriage to a woman who is forbidden to him, we reject the usual standards that would create leniency, and are strict. This is because a sin that lasts for a long time and occurs many times must be treated in a strict matter.

8.       If rabbis disagree and the question is a Torah sin not a rabbinical sin, we must take the stringent side. See Ramo Choshen Mishpot 25:2 in Ramo.

The question now is, what is next? How many women will apply for negation of marriages that produce mamzerim? How many rabbis will be influenced by Rabbis Greenblatt and Kaminetsky to invent new laws about freeing women from their husbands?

Another question is, what do we do when we want to marry off our children? Who can we trust?

We have to find responsible rabbis and Beth Dins and check out each person if they had a GET or not, if it was coerced or not, if it is valid or not.

The next generation will have mamzerim. We must be aware of this, and make sure that we check as carefully as we can not to marry people ruined by Rabbis Greenblatt and Kaminetsky.